Didn't I used to be?

Here's a true story. About 13 years ago I was in the bar after a gig in Whelans when a couple came up to me to tell me how much they enjoyed my show in the Olympia earlier that night. Having actually spent the evening watching the newly-solo Bryan McFadden's not-entirely successful debut gig on Wexford St., I had to inform them that they were sadly mistaken. But they wouldn't hear it, repeatedly telling me – and others – that I was, in fact, Josh Homme from Queens of the Stone Age. To my great shame, I have to admit that, at that point, I was unfamiliar with Homme and, this being the days before smartphones with instant googling capability, it wasn't til I got home that I got to check out my looky-likey. And what a pleasant surprise it was. A far cry from the likes of Chris Evans (my usual lookalike comparison)  Homme was (and has remained), a rather handsome chap, red of hair, sharp of chin and lean of body. I mentioned it to a few people at the time, and they said that, actually yeah, they could see it too. Now, granted, I was perhaps carrying less cargo around my frame then than I am now, but I'm still saying that it felt like a stretch. But, apparently, not an inconceivable stretch. So, happy days, I look like Josh Homme. I'll take that. 

Me, in my new denim jacket, around 2005.

Or at least I used to take that. Last week, I was back in Whelans for another gig. I was standing on my own enjoying the show when two chaps in, I'd guess, their late 20s, approached me (mid-gig, mind you) to ask me – no, to tell me - if I was someone famous. Of course, these are different times, and people can rely on photographic evidence in these situations so they came armed with google images. When I told them I wasn't the person on their screens, they laughed and said "Of course you are - you even sound exactly like him". One of them said that when he wears his glasses he looks a little like him (me?) too. I told him he was much more handsome and he was delighted with himself. High-fives all round. No, really.  Now, you're probably thinking it was still Josh Homme they had me confused with. First of all, bless you - you obviously haven't seen me lately and, secondly, no - you're wrong.  my 2017 lookalike is now Huw Stephens, the Welsh – yes, apparently I now sound Welsh! – broadcaster who you may know from BBC Radio 1 or the BBC's annual TV coverage of Glastonbury. 

Me, in my new denim shirt, standing at a wall recently.

Now, in fairness to the chaps who approached my with their phones, this isn't the first time I've had this. For the last couple of years, whenever Glastonbury is on TV I'll get a handful of texts from friends asking me why I hadn't told them I was going to be on TV. It's become something of a June tradition at this stage. If I'm to look for positives, I could say that Josh Homme is a little younger than me so the guy I was confused with in 2004 was about 31 when I was 32. Not bad. The gut I'm being confused with in 2017 is currently 35, while I'm 44. So that's a positive, right? In the eyes of strangers I've aged just 4 years in well over a decade. That's pretty good. But, let's be honest, from an aesthetic perspective, it's not a step up, is it? That's not a criticism of Mr Stephens who, I'm sure, is doing just fine for himself, but for me, it's evidence that things are only going in one direction. How long can it be before I'm in Whelans and someone asks me if the money's too tight to mention? Not long at all, I fear...

Me, taking a break from denim, any day now...